Coming to the realisation that you are unable to stop doing something that you know deep down is ruining yours and potentially the lives of the people close to you can be a really difficult process to come to terms with. It’s ironic that in order to deal with this realisation, you may find yourself going back to the thing which is destroying who you are, it can feel like a never ending vicious cycle. This is what we mean by being in Active Addiction.
Active addiction is a very broad term and encompasses many different possibilities which may be feeding that addiction. Here at The Dynamo Project, our approach is aimed at individuals affected by drugs and/or alcohol abuse. We are deeply passionate about helping people who are currently where we have been and we feel very strongly about sharing with you what we try to do to change our circumstances rather than telling you what to do and how to do it.
You may find many differing opinions on addiction, some you may relate to, others not so much. We find, that as addicts, we can over-complicate just about anything so we try our best here to keep things simple. You may believe the problems you currently face are because of the substance you take and the fact that despite everything this behaviour causes, you can’t stop, not for anyone or anything and your whole life is consumed by it. We know different; we know that you can stop. You can absolutely do this. And we speak from experience. We are here to help you. From the early stages of recovery, to continued and maintained abstinence, we are here to support you.
The actual substance you took will always have an important part to play in your recovery, it can serve as a reminder of how you felt when you took it but being in recovery is so much more than not just taking substances. The Dynamo Project believe to truly be in recovery that it’s vital to focus on the reasons behind why you took that substance in the first place and in doing so you will gain a better understanding of who you are. This will give you a better chance of making wiser decisions in the future.
We understand that it’s hard to comprehend this initially and you may believe you’re an addict simply because you take drugs. But think about this, maybe you were an addict before you even you took drugs for the first time and this may be the reason why you couldn’t stop. You may know people who, unlike you, can put substances down and use them occasionally. This ability may suggest peoples intentions before they do something can influence the outcome differently. Even when the actual thing they were doing was the same, i.e. using substances.
The Dynamo Project understands how lonely being in active addiction can be. Isolation becomes the norm, you shut yourself off from the outside world, you may believe this is what you deserve and so you punish yourself and in doing so, you become further isolated to the point where you don’t want to be here anymore, you feel that the world will be a better place without you in it, you’re looking to escape.
We are here to tell you, the world will not be a better place without you in it. Addicts are some of the most caring people you will meet; we care too much at times. We are incredibly resourceful with an inner determination that in active addiction can be so damaging, but in recovery that same inner determination can lead to having a beautiful future, free from active addiction.
You may find that you can’t deal with life in general and that’s certainly a valid argument whilst you are using, but it is because you are using that you hold that belief. You have no idea just how capable you are. We would love to tell you that as soon as you put down the drugs and/or alcohol that life becomes easier, that you are then somehow exempt from anything bad happening to you again, but unfortunately it doesn’t work like that, life does not get easier. But believe us when we say that although it doesn’t get easier, you will get stronger and it will get better. The strength you gain from getting through the tough times in recovery cannot be understated, you will learn more about yourself in these instances then you will even on your best days in recovery.
You may currently let the thought of past mistakes weigh you down, or use them as a stick to beat yourself with. The Dynamo Project is not here to tell you to simply forget about them or to treat them like they never happened, it’s not as easy as that. If it were, less people would seek recovery. What we try to do is encourage and support you in using those past mistakes as motivation to become a better version of yourself. Don’t be frightened of making mistakes, without them, how can we grow as a person. The biggest mistake you will ever make is believing you can go through life without making one, no one is perfect and we all make them. It is what we take from them and how we learn from them that is the real game changer.
We could write so much more about this but at some point, you have to stop reading and start doing and this is where we want to help. If you have read this far then this may suggest that you may need some help and advice. The main aim for us is to let you know that you are not alone, there are many people who have been where you are and are currently living their lives in a way they can only previously dream of. Becoming part of a recovery community will play a huge part in achieving a life without drugs and/or alcohol.
There are organisations out there that can provide the right community for you, you may have read that we refer to this as mutual aid (12 step meetings, SMART etc), we are not looking to replace them in any way but to add additional support alongside them. We want you to get involved with them and we will help and support you in any way we can too.
The Dynamo Project speaks about an individual’s life being a continuous story that we write and we all want a story we can be proud of. We will look back and certain chapters will not be a comfortable read for us, we may even avoid them but that doesn’t mean they did not happen. Your past chapters have played a massive part in where you currently find yourself. You may have put the pen down believing your story is done, however The Dynamo Project are here to tell you to pick the pen back up, your story hasn’t ended, its only just beginning again.
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